Tuesday, January 03, 2006

2005 Was "A Great Year For the American People"

Shut up, pussies. Stop complaining about your dead grandmother in New Orleans. Before leaving for his holiday vacation, George Bush told the press that 2005 was "a great year for the American people". Why was it a good year? Because a lot of poor, welfare-mooching, black people drowned, a lot of U.S. soldiers got killed and blown up, a man who admits he hates the U.N. is now the U.N. ambassador, a man who admits that he's "not qualified" now runs the CIA, creepy-ass Harriet (Palpatine) Miers gave George a hard-on, oil prices sky-rocketed over the summer, global warming created like 157 hurricanes, General Motors laid off over 30,000 jobs, Sean Hannity is still alive, the U.S. Government is spying on its own citizens, and George W. Bush got away with another year of lies, deceit and illegality. Seriously, he got away totally scott free. So, fuck you, Ohio. And fuck you, Florida. And while I'm at it, a whopping mother-fuck to you, Utah...


This overwhelmed man is crying and saying, "Oh, my God! This is the best year of my life!"

Tears of joy in New Orleans as FEMA arrives to help.

An official FEMA mini-van saves the day. Mikey Brown is in the driver seat smoking a cigar and masturbating to the cries of dying black people.

George Bush, Mikey Brown, and the rest of the gang combine their Dockers Power to save the people of New Orleans.

Hey, there little man! Forget the fact that your bloated, dead grandmother's corpse just crapped itself! Cheer up! It's a great year for the American people!

Ok, this guy is obviously NOT having a great 2005. But he's a British Soldier, not an American. So, fuck him.

This little cry baby is bathing in her parents' blood. But she's an Iraqi, so, whatever. But, I'm sure the American Soldier standing next to her had a smashingly great 2005!

Yep, she died. Another reason why 2005 was fucking awesome!

Corrupt fucker Tom Delay continues to be an unpunished, dickless turd who plays golf with the president. Hurray 2005!

In 2005, Karl Rove, the walking penis, wasn't indicted for outing a CIA agent or for being a gigantic, floppy, oily penis. Seriously, just look at that head...

He's all like, "Damn straight, I condone torture! Just give me some pliers and I'll twist the nipples right off ANY muthafucka! And there just ain't nothin' you can do about it, bitch!"

Here's a pic of George Bush listening to your phone conversation with your mother last month. Can I get a "hell yeah!" for re-electing this guy?

If 2005 was "a great year", then I'm sure 2006 will be "the greatest"!


Anonymous said...

Awesome post!

~Foo Fighter~

Anonymous said...

Just to remind you of the divide that exists...here is a link from the right-wing hack at my local paper.

It's titled (without irony) "OVERALL A PRETTY GOOD YEAR FOR BUSH"


~Foo Fighter~

Anonymous said...

Oh and for a really good laugh contrast the article above about Bush with this article about our Democrat Governor.


"Rendell’s legacy: Three years of failure"

Is the governor of Pennsylvania subject to random drug testing? I’m beginning to worry about Ed Rendell. I think he’s on something. How else do you explain his recent end-of-the-year news conference where he proclaimed a successful year for his administration?

I’m not sure Rendell is living on the same planet as 12 million other Pennsylvanians. Ed Rendell appears to be the governor of the state of dementia.

--------- snip -----------

...etc. etc. etc. You get the picture.


Amazing isn't it.

It's like a 10 year old boy that idolizes the Dallas Cowboys. Loves the Cowboys and all the other teams suck.

~Foo Fighter~